Morphene arms,vicodin smile,narcotic eyes,
Duragesic skin,marijuana hair,acid tongue.
Percocet lips give chemical kisses.
Intoxicated heart.
Numb body and mind.
Bong hopes and pipe dreams.
Needle songs and opiod lullabyes.
Smothered soul,
Tired life.
Dillusions fill my head,
Intrusions in my bed.
Pleasure-seekers disguised as prince charming,
Alarming,isn't it,how we're all so easily led astray,
Pray?
To whom?
An imaginary God that shall one day,"save us all,"
Call -out to him do I,but my pleas are lost in the air.
Aware -now,that I'm truly...all alone.
Duragesic skin,marijuana hair,acid tongue.
Percocet lips give chemical kisses.
Intoxicated heart.
Numb body and mind.
Bong hopes and pipe dreams.
Needle songs and opiod lullabyes.
Smothered soul,
Tired life.
Dillusions fill my head,
Intrusions in my bed.
Pleasure-seekers disguised as prince charming,
Alarming,isn't it,how we're all so easily led astray,
Pray?
To whom?
An imaginary God that shall one day,"save us all,"
Call -out to him do I,but my pleas are lost in the air.
Aware -now,that I'm truly...all alone.
posted by amber at 3:44 AM
2 Comments:
rebecca-i appreciate your comment and most of it i agree with.yes i'm very confused at times.i don't know what to believe in,there's so many religions and alot of them have their good points.so it's been hard for me to find one and feel totally commited to it so i just say that i try to believe in a god,a higher being,whatever,but some days it's hard to believe in anything, that's when i write my dark stuff.also,most of my poems are not about drugs,i think actually this is the only one.i write about them though because i used to be strung out on everything out there,especially speed,i've been clean for 7 yrs.all i do now is take my pain meds,i have to for med problems.sometimes i feel like a slave to the pills cause i know i can never stop taking them,my health problems won't get better with time,they get worse.also,the thing about god,sometimes i am afraid to believe incase all the bible is is just crap we made up to help us feel better.so i'm afraid to be made a fool.i'm like that with alot of things,relationships,i'm afraid to say i really trust someone incase they're cheating on me,then i'd look like a fool for trusting them,but if i never really say for sure that i totally believe in them,then if it does end that they cheat on me , i don't look like so much of an idiot,make sense? i know it's cowardice but i'm afraid to put all my faith in someone that may not be real.that's my issue with god,now christianity is different.i'm not christian,i dont believe that gays or anyone who has a baby out of wedlock will go to hell.that's the kind of thinking that i can't agree with and that will never change.but you can believe in god and not be christian,some ppl dont believe that.when i write about god or praying i'm not talking about god in the christian sense,just god in general.i think there are so many possibilities out there that i could never say with complete certainty that i believe this or that.who knows where we came from or where we go when we die..the answer could be something so wild that our human minds couldn't even comprehend the idea.i think that all religions and beliefs have their purpose and it's right for some but not all,it's whatever feels right to you.one day something happens that shows you which one is right for you.i'm glad that you found yours and it has helped you deal with your loss,i can't imagine what it's like to lose a child.i did lose someone very close to me as i'm sure you read in my posts so i do know what it's like to lose someone and not know how to go on without them.it's been almost 2 yrs and it still hurts like the day he died.maybe if i ever heal from that then i'll be able to find my way.
i do believe in some kind of afterlife.i've had dreams about my friend and he tells me that he's in a "waiting room" .i do believe that i will be with him again.i'm just not sure exactly what the afterlife is,there's many different religions that have different theories on that.basically,i do believe in a god and a afterlife,i'm just not sure who is right..christians,jews,mormans,pagans.i have my beefs with each one and i agree with some parts of alot of them so that's where i'm confused.thats why it's hard for me to commit to one.i do pray,and i do teach my kids about god,,i just don't really go into much detail about all the other stuff that i myself am not sure about.like how we should view homosexuals,abortion etc...i tell my kids that there is a god and angels that watch over them and keep them safe.i leave the rest open because i feel that when they're older i want them to be able to make their own decisions about it.i want them to know about all religions and then decide,not just subjected to one cause it seems that people usually just believe whatever their parents told them to.i think that god is real but man isn't perfect so when the bible was written there had to be some mistakes,especially when it was translated.everyone knows the catholic church has chosen to leave out some scriptures.thats why its hard for me to put all my faith in the bible cause who knows what was messed with.i just believe what i feel is right,not just cause the bible says so,ya know?i think that as long as you believe in god and try your best to be a good person then you'll be ok when you die,no matter what the afterlife is.
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